Welcome to 2011 followers. I'm sure we're all wishing for a lot of positive changes to football in 2011, but much as I hate to disappoint...FIFA will still be a corrupt bunch of clowns, the FA will still be a spineless load of old twats and Big Fat Sam will get another job. The awful fat tosser. Nani will still go down like a sack of shite whenever anyone has the audacity to attempt to take the ball off him, Glen Johnson will still be linked with moves upwards of £15mil even though he's utter gash. The more that changes, the more stays the same. I will compile my own irreverent review of last year's events, as well as a preview of what can be expected in 2011 in the next week or two. Something for you all to get excited about I'm sure! My musical recommendation to welcome this 2011 in is Rotting Out by Descendents, a 2 minute beauty.
As it's FA Cup weekend this week I'll try and pick out a couple of possible upsets and do some tips for the 'Big' games.
Arsenal v Leeds, Saturday 1245
The weekend kicks off with former greats, Leeds, Leeds, Leeds travelling to The Emirates to take on The Gunners. Arsenal once again showed on Wednesday night why they frustrate punters and neutral fans alike. They tore Man City apart for large spells before fart-arsing around in front of the 18 yard line and generally refusing to lower themselves to shooting. When they did let fly, they hit the post a couple of times through Van the Man, but rather than this being an example to others, the rest of his team-mates continued pissing about. All masturbation and no ejaculation, in my opinion. Leeds have been something of a suprise in The Championship this season. They only came up this season, but along with the mighty Norwich City, have immediately made themselves known at the top end of the table. They get plenty of goals, but their problem comes in keeping them out. This should see Arsenal taking advantage if wenger puts anything resembling a proper team out. Hopes of a repeat of last season's cup heroics will be extinguished early for those wonderful Yorkshiremen making the trip. Ladbrokes go 2.1 on Arsenal -1.75 on the asians and I'd recommend that.
Millwall v Birmingham, Saturday 1330
Second game in and my first possible upset. Birmingham are absolute gash at present. Toothless up front and beginning to wobble at the back. Millwall have had a mixed season, but have been good at home and in Steve Morison they have a striker that will surely get a chance in the rem sooner or later. He's a big, strong lad, who has got goals at every level so far and is continuing in the 2nd tier. I think Birmingham might rest players for this one as staying in the Prem will surely be the priority for Alex McCleish. The first team is bad enough, so Millwall should really fancy their chances of gaining an upset in this. Best price is 2.5 and it's still pretty easy to find.
Doncaster v Wolves, Saturday 1500
In amongst the 3pm kick offs we find this potential banana skin! Donny have been nicknamed 'the Arsenal of the Championship' for the way they go about their football, and when on song they can be a tremendous side. Whilst Wolves have been much improved of late in the league, we have all seen in previous season's how Mick McCarthy treats matches/competitions he isn't fussed about. I would expect wholesale changes to the team from the win over Chelsea. because Doncaster itself is a bit of a dump, with very little to attract people too the place, they struggle to compete financially with their Championship rivals. This is a chance to shine for the team and possibly to put themselves in the shop window for a move to a bigger side. Motivation enough for me to back them at 2.8 with Stan James.
Hull v Wigan, Saturday 1500
Another Champo v Prem match up in this one. Hull started the season in the form they were in for around 18 months, in a word, dogshit. However comma they have turned things around a bit of late to record some points and begin to move away from the basement. Wigan are shit. I would not be suprised to see a record low away attendance for this, maybe only 100 or so. They have about as many fans as Austrian DIY entusiast Joseph Fritzl and deserve to be in League 1 or 2 for me. I can't stand their chairman Dave Whelan and how he thinks his opinion is wanted on every-bloody-thing that comes up in football. He's a no mark, bald twat, and I'd rather he just pissed off back to running chav clothing specialists JJB. I fancy Hull to get through to Round 4 in this and Betfred are a best priced 2.75.
Stevenage v Newcastle, Saturday 1730
the late game on TV is self proclaimed 'massive club' (but with sod all trophies, ever) travelling to League 2 Boro. Stevenage have performed well in their first season back in the League proper, and home form has been a large part of that. They have a fairly small, compact ground, that makes it a less than favoured trip for most sides. Newcastle will make the trip buoyed by their victory over a piss-poor West Ham side in midweek. Having played better over the xmas period, The Irons reverted to type with a truly insipid display. It's easy to make the foreigners don't fancy it assessment, but from what I've seen that is the problem. The English lads are trying, but their doesn't appear to be any team spirit and that makes them seem lost at times. Back to Newcastle, Leon Best made his return to first team action with a hat-trick and I'd expect him to start here too. Goals often come in gluts, so I'll be a backer at 2.87 with Boylesports on him finding the onion bag at some stage.
Man Utd v Liverpool, Sunday 1330
This will in all likelihood be Woy Hodgson's farewell to the Anfield hotseat. His position has surely become untenable with yet another pathetic away surrender, this time at Blackburn Rovers. Rovers couldn't even field more than 7 of their regular starters, yet Pool contrived to make them look like Barcelona. It is clear from Torres body language and Reina's regression that something isn't right in the dressing room and whether that's Hodgson's fault or not, he has to go for the club to move forward. I personally think that barring Torres being on fire, they have no better a squad than someone like Everton or Bolton, so their league position isn't a huge shock. But, the fact that they rarely even look bothered is reason enough to try a different approach. United continued their run of mediocre performances somehow garnering points with Victory at West Brom. With WBA now without a win in 5 it isn't as impressive as it might have been 2 months ago. Rooney still looks like his goal filled season was the blip, not the norm to me. He's a good player, sometimes very good, but no better than that. More fool Red Nose and the Glazers for caving in to his ridiculous wage demands. He'll be Hernandez understudy in a year if they carry on their respective trajectories. All being said, you can be sure Fergie will want to inflict more pain on Pool, this should see a strong side out. If Blackburn can beat them by 2 I'm going to handicap Utd by 1.0 on the asian at an appealing 2.07 with VCBet.
Tottenham v Charlton, Sunday 1330
The other early match on Sunday sees a London derby with Sloppy Chops men welcoming former Prem regulars Charlton to Shite Fart Lane. The Spuds continued to make Redknapp and Defoe look like the morns they are in losing 2-1 away at Everton this week. Both had claimed they would be in the title fight, not a flaming chance. They're far too inconsistent and look like Ossie Ardiles much-maligned side with all round better players to me. There are no tactics outside of 'score more than them', and this will make sure they never challenge for a league title with 'Arry at the helm. Charlton are pushing for promotion at the top of League 1 having experienced a few years of poor management. Even Spurs bench is good these days, and I would expect them to win this comfortably even if a reserve side is fielded. The pace they are capable of attacking at should see off a League 1 side with ease. Paddy Power qoutes of 2.5 on the Yids to win both halves seems a decent bet to me.
Chelsea v Ipswich, Sunday 1500
As I write this, I am seeing reports Roy Keane has been given more time to spend walking his dog. Much as he was a truly excellent player, and spoke the truth a lot of the time about the modern girly footballer, he was ill suited to management. Especially at a lower level. It's all very well recognising players now are pathetic, stupid creatures ruled by their agents and wives. But, if you then shout and scream and try intimidating them then how can you expect a performance, they'll sulk. This is no way for a grown man to behave, but this is what you supporters of Prem and Champo clubs are largely cheering on. Chelsea have also been on a horrendous run, and were they to lose this then Ancelotti would surely be heading back to Italy. It looks like age has caught up with most of the Chelsea side at the same time, and the lack of planning for the future means that no-one is coming through to replace them. Josh McEachran excepted, he looks a class act. I can only see them heading backwards form here on in. The vicious circle will see Abramovich putting less money in and the team getting worse. This will see him getting bored and eventually pulling out. Whereby a Leeds style fall would not be out of the question. This wont happen Sunday though! Frank Lampard returned to action scoring a penalty on Saturday and will take them all again now. He seems a very good price at 2.0 with a number of firms to score anytime.
Leicester v Man City, Sunday 1600
The last game on Sunday sees Sven hosting his former employers at the Walkers Stadium. Since going to Leicester all sorts of big name sin the latter stages of their careers have been linked with the club. This to me just shows how very ill-suited Sven is to managing without significant cash. Players like David Beckham will not be turning out for his new side, they would do better to look at promising players in lower leagues, but Sven has zero knowledge of this. Expect a couple of seasons of mid-table mediocrity before a parting of ways. City should view this competition as a chance to win some silverware and get in the habit of doing so. One brings two and all that. I can't see Mancini fielding his real stars for this one though, expect Adam Johnson to be given a rare start as well as fringe players like Jo and possibly Adebayor, the lazy twat. This should be more than enough to see off Leicester. Bet365 go 2.2 on the -1.0 asian and I think City can cover it.
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